a fresh start.
Before you read this, just know that this is my story. This is my life. It is messy and it is not perfect. It is scary and sad. But it is my life and I wouldn't change it for anything at this point.
do you ever just look at your life and see how far you've come and become so grateful that you still fought even when you felt like giving up? or see old pictures from years ago and see a picture from the other day and not even recognize yourself because you've changed so much? I had that moment the other night.
2017 was a rough year for me. I started the year off extremely sick because of all the medications I was put on. We were trying to find the right medication for my anxiety and depression and it ended up ruining a part of me. This ended up bringing back memories and trials that I never wanted to struggle through ever again. After many trials, I finally decided that I needed a break from medication. I was off for a couple months before finally going back and getting put on a better medication. I was terrified. I was hurt. But I knew it helped me.
I suffered loss in 2017. Loss of friends, loss of family, but most importantly, loss of myself. It wasn't until towards the end of the year that I realized people will always come and go but I need to love myself and treat myself right. A few days before the new year, I decided I was going to do everything I could to become stronger. Mentally, Physically and Emotionally. I knew that it was going to be a rough year as I do not handle change very well. I decided 2018 is going to be my year. The year I do what is best for me. A fresh start.
2018. It has been 3 weeks into the new year and I have struggled with finding myself. In 2017, I forgot how to love myself and 2018 is a fresh start. I am learning how to love myself again, learning new things about myself and figuring out what I truly want in life. Sometimes it takes loss and hitting rock bottom to really realize what you want in life. I want to write more. I want to dance more. I want to have fun and not spend every second in my room watching my life from the outside. I want to live my life. So thank you 2017, for teaching me that I can really hold my own and I do not need someone else in my life in order to live my life. I need me.
This is my year. I am living it.
From caterpillar to cocoon to the butterfly. I am here.
do you ever just look at your life and see how far you've come and become so grateful that you still fought even when you felt like giving up? or see old pictures from years ago and see a picture from the other day and not even recognize yourself because you've changed so much? I had that moment the other night.
2017 was a rough year for me. I started the year off extremely sick because of all the medications I was put on. We were trying to find the right medication for my anxiety and depression and it ended up ruining a part of me. This ended up bringing back memories and trials that I never wanted to struggle through ever again. After many trials, I finally decided that I needed a break from medication. I was off for a couple months before finally going back and getting put on a better medication. I was terrified. I was hurt. But I knew it helped me.
I suffered loss in 2017. Loss of friends, loss of family, but most importantly, loss of myself. It wasn't until towards the end of the year that I realized people will always come and go but I need to love myself and treat myself right. A few days before the new year, I decided I was going to do everything I could to become stronger. Mentally, Physically and Emotionally. I knew that it was going to be a rough year as I do not handle change very well. I decided 2018 is going to be my year. The year I do what is best for me. A fresh start.
2018. It has been 3 weeks into the new year and I have struggled with finding myself. In 2017, I forgot how to love myself and 2018 is a fresh start. I am learning how to love myself again, learning new things about myself and figuring out what I truly want in life. Sometimes it takes loss and hitting rock bottom to really realize what you want in life. I want to write more. I want to dance more. I want to have fun and not spend every second in my room watching my life from the outside. I want to live my life. So thank you 2017, for teaching me that I can really hold my own and I do not need someone else in my life in order to live my life. I need me.
This is my year. I am living it.
From caterpillar to cocoon to the butterfly. I am here.
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